PDY

 One short week, 1,700+ miles, and a world away…

‘Twas only a week ago I sat writing in Lincoln Center, waiting for the rain to ease up so I could walk back to the apartment, through the park of course. That was the penultimate NY walk, for my daughter Alex and I took another on Monday morning, the farewell to Central Park, the last visit to Strawberry Fields, at least for the time being. After a train ride to Newark, we got in our rental car, with full intentions (mine) of driving back on the roads on which I walked, retracing steps, stopping to see new and old friends, in fast rewind mode. It didn’t happen as planned.

Lesson 495, or whatever the number is… you can never go back. You can kinda/sorta go back, you can go to the same places, but the experience will never be the same twice. There are way too many factors that go into a moment, every moment, and trying to re-create one is futile, for the experience will never be the same.

Some of the contributing factors are more obvious than others. weather and seasons for example. Alex and I left Newark in a snowstorm, a beautiful snowstorm. So right from the beginning, things were already different. The trees that brought all the color only a week prior were accumulating snow. Weird. Actually, the whole drive was quite weird, cool, but weird.

Given the weather, we weren’t able to retrace the New Jersey roads that were so pretty a week before, and we headed into Pennsylvania. There were a lot of things I wanted to see again and show Alex, but after a three hour drive, we decided to stay in Quakertown PA, a whopping 85 miles from our start! It was strange thinking that we had arrived in a matter of hours, given that the last time I was there was nine days before I arrived in NY. This difference between walking hours and driving minutes was a predominant thought the entire way. And here we were, in the exact hotel room (330), under totally different circumstances. We actually drove to dinner, whereas nine days prior, I ate dinner at the only place within walking distance.

Next day, a little sprinkle of snow didn’t delay our departure, and we drove through a very beautiful part of Pennsylvania. The horses that came to greet me in the pasture were still there, and we saw them for 20 seconds or so as we rushed by. Then into the Pennsylvania Amish Country, beautiful as before albeit somewhat warmer than when I walked it! Alex wanted to see a horse drawn carriage, to which I said of course we’d see some, I had seen at least a dozen. We saw none on the road, two in the parking lot, and then I realized the big difference was that I spent six hours on that road, whereas we were only there for about 30 minutes! After Lancaster and York, we headed to Maryland, parallel to the Rails-to-Trails path I so enjoyed. And into Maryland we went, actually followed some of the roads I walked, and ended up at Cindy&Ned’s for a brief visit. Fed the horses and off we went. Spent the night in Frederick - 2 days of driving and 230 miles covered; pretty good if you’re walking, but at that rate, we’d still be driving today!

Wednesday was Virginia day, the stunning Shenandoah Valley all over again. Lovely, but different, and it was then the lesson finally hit home, at the last remaining covered bridge in VA. I was there on Halloween, under very different circumstances of course. That had only been a month ago, yet so much had changed. The bridge remains, but leaves were gone, it was colder, and the corn maze that was there on Halloween had been razed to the ground. But more important than any of that was me, not that I’m all that important, but my place in time was. Way back a month ago, I was walking to somewhere, now I was driving to somewhere else. And I wasn’t alone, I was with Alex. Things were different, and it was then that I realized yet once again that you can’t accurately re-live any prior experiences, as much as you may try. So then began a new road-trip, a great opportunity to spend unrecoverable time with my favorite middle daughter and just go back to enjoying the moment.

And down the road we went. Stopped to say hi to my friend Marichuy at Jalisco’s Mexican Restaurant, had another laugh, briefly saw Lorena in Lexington, and made our way to Bristol… same hotel, same little state-line cluster of stores and restaurants, now on a different trip altogether.

Next day into Tennessee - wore my orange shirt just for kicks, and to fit in :-). We didn’t even try to retrace roads and places, though a lot of them were familiar and it was fun driving past them on our new road trip. Next stop, Nashville. Apologies to all of you in Tennessee for not stopping by to thank you, but know I appreciate your enhancing my October of 2019. Alex and I were on a mission.

Fast forward a few hours and mission accomplished. Rather suddenly in walking terms, here we were at the Bridgestone Arena in downtown Nashville waiting for Ariana Grande to take the stage. If you need to, re-read the previous sentence, but yes, there we were. I couldn’t help thinking of the difference between that night and the prior hundred… it was noisy, crowded, and I admit to thinking about some of the country roads within walking distance (intended) of where we were. Concert was fun. I kinda like Ariana Grande… don’t know a whole lot about her, and don’t need all the details, but she has a tremendous voice, and she showed amazing class after her Manchester concert. Plus, she’s followed her dream since she was a little girl - that’s good. Alex has always been my concert buddy, ever since I took her to see Avril Lavigne in San Antonio in 2004, as a little girl of nine years old. Several have ensued since, and it’s always a good time. You don’t have to ask twice, I’ll go to a concert anytime, be it Avril or Ariana.

And then the final drive to Texas. I had wanted to retrace the first week, primarily to say hi and thank you to the people that were so kind, but then thought I could do that anytime, as most of them are within a couple of hours of Austin. I must admit, contrary to how I try to live my life, but at about noon, it had nothing to do with the journey, we just wanted to get ourselves home! Fourteen hours and 850 miles later the Austin skyline was in front of us, and our road trip came to a very tired end. And tired I was - it’s much easier to walk to Nashville than it is to drive!

Yesterday was unpacking day - not my backpack, but all the shtuff that was in my new room. While I was away, we moved out of one apartment into another. As I was walking out of Memphis back in September, my kids were kind enough to move all my stuff, but I had to unpack. It’s a good thing I’m doing now, having realized how little one needs to be happy. For nearly four months, all I needed was securely strapped to my back. There was nothing additional I wanted, and as I unpacked box after box, much of the content was being put right back into another box, soon to be headed to Goodwill or the Salvation Army and hopefully will bring warmth and happiness to someone soon.

And this being a story about walking, yesterday was my first walk in five days, and if felt like the first in five years. After a tedious day of boxes, I started off on the walk I’d been anticipating all day. Weird walking Austin again. The last time I walked here it was over a hundred degrees, and I was walking with my backpack laden with cans of tomatoes and dirty laundry, in preparation for this walk I was planning to New York City. I was looking forward to my nice quiet park, but instead was met with thousands of lights on all its trees, the Trail of Lights, Austin’s celebration of the holiday season. Nice, but not my quiet park, so I walked around it and then to the grocery store for ingredients to make my first homemade meal since August.

I was amazed at how quickly I had lost my walking fitness or stamina or whatever it was, but that little mile from the store to my apartment was the longest, most painful mile of 2019. I have no idea what was going on inside, but everything hurt. I don’t know exactly how many bones are in my feet, but every single one of them was begging for attention. I do know I have two hips, and they were both on fire. My back too. I was very tempted to hop on a bike or any one of the electric scooters laying on the side of the sidewalk, but I resisted and made it back without wheeled assistance. All better today, but I’m going to avoid this if I can in the future by walking every day, at least a little bit, rain or shine.

And I have quit trying to re-live moments - you can’t, it’s that simple. Instead, I will concentrate on living every one, very conscious of the fact that they will never return. It’s a one shot deal, no rewind buttons, no replay, slo-mo or otherwise. I will look at the pictures fondly, knowing that I lived every step I took to Strawberry Fields, and try to carry that to every park I visit, the park being any happy place I choose.